Tak bisa di pungkiri, terkadang kita harus berhadapan dengan orang yang
tidak baik di lingkingan sekitar, termasuk tetangga. Dari mulai di
sindir, di cibir hingga tak di ajak bertegur sapa, mungkin pernah kita
alami.
Memiliki tetangga yang jahat memang menimbulkan berbagai macam perasaan,
dari mulai khawatir, segan, sedih, hingga kesal dan benci.
Kadang hidup ini lucu,
orang yang tadinya baik-baik kepada kita, tiba-tiba menjadi benci kepada
kita. Orang yang selalu baik-baik dikala di depan kita, ternyata
dibelakang kita menghina atau menjelek-jelekan kita habis-habisan.
Kenapa orang bisa berlaku seperti itu, apakah mereka tidak punya hati,
apakah mereka tidak bisa bicara jujur, ataukah mereka memang ada niat
yang jelek terhadap diri kita.
Biasanya
orang yang tidak bisa menahan emosi dan hanya bisa berani bicara di
belakang itu, tandanya mereka lebih senang menusuk dari belakang. Oleh
karena itu, kita harus berhati-hati apabila menghadapi orang seperti
itu, karena adakalanya mereka bicara didepan kita manis, tetapi
dibelakang kita malah menjelek-jelekan kita.
Sekarang pertanyaannya kenapa orang bisa tiba-tiba benci kepada orang
lain ? Secara ilmu psikologi, hal ini terjadi dari pikiran sadar kita
yang menyerap atau menerima respon yang masuk kedalam otak, kemudian
lambat laun tertanan dalam syaraf-syarat pikiran kita dan akhirnya
sampai masuk kedalam pikiran bahwa sadar. Pikiran kita pada akhirnya
sedikit demi sedikit terkontaminasi oleh perasaan tersebut.
Bagi sebagian orang yang mempunyai pikiran positif dalam diri mereka,
kemungkinan kecil mereka akan terkena pikiran negatif, sehingga
kemungkinan kecil mereka akan mempunyai penyakit hati. Tetapi bagi
mereka yang dalam kesehariannya selalu berpikir negatif, maka
kemungkinan besar hati dan pikiran mereka juga menjadi negatif pula.
Ada kalanya orang yang
benci terhadap kita, pada akhirnya berkomplot untuk membuat tudingan
atau tuduhan yang tidak dapat dipertanggung jawabkan. Apalagi ada orang
yang tidak mempunyai prinsip kebenaran, maka jika mereka diajak bicara
mereka bisa dengan mudah terbawa ikut-ikutan. Hal ini terjadi sebagai
akibat dari adanya masalah pribadi atau benci karena masalah pribadi
terhadap diri kita.
Memang
kalau dilihat dari sisi orang yang benci terhadap kita, mungkin mereka
akan selalu berpikiran terbalik dengan apa yang kita pikirkan atau yang
kita inginkan. Tetapi satu hal yang harus kita ingat bahwa, kadang orang
benci terhadap kita bisa menjalar atau menjadi hal yang besar bagi diri
kita. Untuk itu dalam menghadapi hal seperti itu, apabila kita sebagai
korban tentu harus mawas diri, dan harus mencari solusi bagaimana keluar
dari masalah yang sedang dihadapi.
Berikut sedikit tips ringan yang seharusnya perlu Anda terapkan dalam menghadapi situasi tetangga yang saling membenci, iri dengki, mencemooh, main belakang terhadap Anda :
1. BERSABAR DAN BERLAPANG DADA
Terhadap tetangga yang jahat ini hendaknya kita jangan membalas
perbuatanya, melainkan mencoba bersabar. Dengan begitu kita justru
menjadi pribadi yang mulia di mata ALLAH.
Hal ini di tegaskan dalam Hadits Abu Dzaar:
Ketika Mutaarif bin Abdullah bertemu denganya, ia berkata: “Wahai Abu
Dzaar, aku mendengar tentang apa yang engkau katakan dan aku ingin
bertemu denganmu. Abu Dzaar berkata: “Ayahmu adalah seorang laki-laki
besar! Sekarang engkau telah bertemu denganku.” Mutaarif berkata: “Aku
mendengar bahwa engkau mengatakan bahwa Rasulullah Shallallahu ‘alayhi
wassalam bersabda: Allah mencintai tiga kelompok dan membenci tiga
kelompok.”
Abu dzzar menjawab: “Aku tidak berpikir bahwa aku akan berbohong mengenai Rasulullah.”
Mutaarif berkata: “ Maka siapakah tiga kelompok orang yang di cintai
Allah itu?” AbuDzaar (dengan mengutip Rasulullah) berkata: “Orang yang
bertempur mencari ridha Allah, dengan penuh semangat dan menharap pahala
dari-Nya, dan bertempur hingga dia tewas , dan engkau menemukan hal ini
dalam dalam kitab Allah.” Kemudian ia membaca: “Sesungguhnya Allah
menyukai orang-orang yang berperang di jalan-Nya dalam barisan yang
teratur seakan-akan mereka seperti bangunan yang tersusun kokoh (Q.S
Ash-Shaf(61) ayat 4).
Mutaarif bertanya: “Kemudian siapa lagi?.” Ia menjawab: “Seorang
laki-laki yang memiliki seorang tetangga jahat yang menjengkelkan dan
mengganggunya, namun ia menghadapinya dengan kesabaran kelapangan
sehingga Allah menyelesaikan persoalan tersebut selama masa hidupnya
atau setelah kematian salah satu dari mereka.”
2. JANGAN TERBAWA EMOSI
Memang kalau dilihat dari sisi orang yang benci terhadap kita, mungkin
mereka akan selalu berpikiran terbalik dengan apa yang kita pikirkan
atau yang kita inginkan. Tetapi satu hal yang harus kita ingat bahwa,
kadang orang benci terhadap kita bisa menjalar atau menjadi hal yang
besar bagi diri kita. Untuk itu dalam menghadapi hal seperti itu,
apabila kita sebagai korban tentu harus mawas diri, dan harus mencari
solusi bagaimana keluar dari masalah yang sedang dihadapi.
Kita janganlah terbawa emosi terhadap orang-orang yang benci kepada
kita, karena dengan kita emosi mungkin inilah yang mereka inginkan.
Mereka ingin melihat kita emosi dan akhirnya kita lepas kontrol akan
situasi yang ada, dan tentunya ini akan membuat mereka menjadi senang.
Untuk itu, kita haruslah bijak menghadapi orang yang benci terhadap
kita, dan janganlah kita terbawa arus dengan pola pikir dan pola
permainan mereka.
3. ANALISA PERBUATAN MEREKA
Orang yang suka mencela kita secara serius, biasanya sedang stress,
punya masalah dan biasanya punya masa lalu yang negatif (kegagalan,
bangkrut, iri dengki dan lain-lain).
Apa yang dilakukan tiap orang pada dasarnya ada penyebabnya dan ada
tujuannya. Oleh karena itu, marilah kita belajar menganalisa perilaku
orang lain dan menemukan kesimpulan tentang motivasi atau latar
belakangnya.
Menghadapi orang yang demikian sebaiknya kita bersifat realistis.
Artinya, kita tidak mungkin mengubah watak orang lain. Adanya memang
begitu. Bersikap mengalah merupakan langkah terbaik, sebab suatu saat
orang tersebut akan mengetahui kesalahannya walaupun tidak mau mengakui
kesalahannya.
4. SABAR
Inilah kata yang paling ampuh menghadapi berbagai ulah.
Orang-orang yang tak seide atau bahkan bertentangan atau berlawanan,
bahkan bisa jadi seperti ” benalu” di sebuah pohon, kemana orang yang
dibencinya bergerak, orang ini akan mengikutinya dan membuat komen yang
bisa saja menjengkelkannya, karena memang itu tujuannya.
Orang seperti
ini sengaja membuat marah, hobinya yang “menghantam” pihak lain. Begitu
juga yang terjadi di lingkungan tetangga dan lain sebagainya,
ada saja orang yang “menghantam” orang lain karena beda kelas ekonominya, beda paham,
dan lain sebagainya, baik dilakukan terang-terangan
maupun diam-diam. Bahkan bila yang dibenci adalah musuh dalam sebuah penciptaan karya, maka
racunpun bicara!
5. TIDAK MEMBALAS DENGAN KALIMAT YG KASAR PULA.
Kalau terjadi, maka "pancingan"nya berhasil.
Karena orang yang membalas kekasaran dengan kekasaran, kejahatan dengan
kejahatan, ibarat api ditambah api, maka akan semakin merajalela dan
“kebakaran” akan semakin meluas. Sifat api yang panas, bukan dilawan
dengan panas pula, tapi dengan lawannya, yaitu air yang dingin. Api di
balas dengan air, panas di balas dengan dingin, kekerasan di balas
dengan kelembutan dan caci maki dibalas dengan doa !
INGAT !! Semakin pohon itu tumbuh tinggi menjulang, semakin kencang pula angin menerpanya.
Semakin kita dewasa, semakin banyak pula permasalahannya.
Dulu kita hidup belum berumah tangga, permasalahanpun relatif sedikit yang menimpa dalam kehidupan, semenjak kita memutuskan untuk hidup berumah tangga dan berpindah-pindah tempat tinggal, pastilah kita menemukan berbagai macam pelangi, hiruk pikuk, warna warni permasalahan, pun termasuk permasalahan dengan tetangga sekitar kita.
Ada yang suka ngegosip, ada yang suka mengarang cerita ekstrim, ada yang suka mempengaruhi tetangga lain untuk membenci kita, dan masih banyak lagi cara cara kotor yang akan mereka pergunakan untuk menjatuhkan dan melemahkan kita.
So, having fun, hidup cuma sekali, buatlah untuk beribadah, mendekatkan diri kepada Allah, tidak perlu mengurusi yang tidak perlu untuk diurusi maupun celoteh orang lain.
Bersabarlah dan rileks-lah.
Semoga bermanfaat.
Sumber : dari segala sumber.
image : kesekolah.com
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BalasHapustetangga yang dengki iri hati hasut bagaikan musuh dalam selimut kita harus sabar pasrah sama Alloh elus"dada kita semoga kita gak kena tekanan batin aammiin
BalasHapusGan klo ada tetangga yg sampe ngempesin ban gmana?
BalasHapuswah itu sangat wajar gan, alias wajib di hajar
HapusMudah2an bisa bersabar
BalasHapusBelajarlah hidup bersyukur, walaupun tetangga jahat, biarlah. Tetangga jahat karena mereka iri dg kehidupan kita, jadikanlah hal tsb membuat kita selalu bersyukur
BalasHapusSabar adalah jalan keluar terbaik
BalasHapusJangan terlalu dipikir kalau ada tetangga yang jahat, asal tidak kelewatan, dibiarin saja ntar berenti2 sendiri kalau udah capek
BalasHapusHidup ada pahit dan manisnya, saat waktunya pahit diterima saja lapang dada, jangan dibales jahat juga
BalasHapussabar itu apa ? ,betapa mdah mengatakannya,pada kenyataaannya sangat menguras tenaga dan cukup membuat sakit ,bagi anda yg sdah memiliki kesabaran,selamat anda berhak mendapat surga
BalasHapusSilahkan berzikir dan banyak puasa dlm menghadapi tetangga yg sirik ( SETAN BERKULIT MANUSIA)
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Mgkn karena mereka ga kerja kali ya..
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Mgkn karena mereka ga kerja kali ya..
Jadi ga ada kerjaa...
Dari mulai org tua smpe anak2 nya masya Allah..
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BalasHapusKalau saya terganggu sama tetangga depan rumah saya itu gerak gerik saya di mata2in apa yg sy beli selalu ikutan dari motor saya beli mobil dia langsung bobok kamer buat garasi mobil beli mobil juga dari baju samaan seperti anak kembar lama2 saya terganggu dengan ulah orang gila itu saya ganti pager garasi dia langsung bongkar juga tuh padahal baru ganti 2 bulan yg lalu di ganti pager garasi dgn warna yg sama dgn saya punya sekarang saya sadar saya lagi berhadapan dgn orang gila dan stres maklumlah dia tadinya pwmbantu di warteg punya suami ngamggur sekarang dia suaminya kerja di pabrik takeda xoncee vitamin gayanya kaya orang kaya padahal tetep aja gembel beli barang bolehlah tapi harus pintar jgn maunya kembaran terus nggak punya prinsip
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Salam santun.
menang BERSAMA
hidup adalah PERJUANGAN
Aku malah listrik aku dimatiin tetangga aku. Juga ada tetangga aku yang dimatikan listriknya. Karena kami tidak tinggal sama suami, pas suamu kerja. Aku tahu orang-orangnya, cuma jarena tidak ada bukti tidak akan ngaku kan. Aku teriakin saja. Eee malah bergosip. Pas suamiku datang, tidak ada gerakan lagi.Memang beraninya cuma sama perempuan. Kasihannya tetanggaku yang lampunya dimatiin juga, punya anak kecil SD dan tetanggaku itu, punya penyakit jantung.
BalasHapusSetuju. In Shaa ALLAH aku yakin, orang yang menzolimi aku, akan mati satu persatu. Aamiin.
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BalasHapusSaya diam dia ngelunjak, saya lawan dia kuat, nasib anak perantauan. Sebatangkara . tolong gan solusinya....
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BalasHapusdia cerita sma tetangga lain kta nya benci liat saya gak negur dia cuekin dia ya Allah dia gk tau pada saat itu saya lagi tenangin anak saya yg lagi nangis .. dstu dia marah sma saya benci sma saya ... saya sudah diam masih saja di cibir nya ...Selalu Sabar liat tingkah dia ..
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